Uhh...cats can't talk, and Heathcliff has shown no super-feline ability to do so...ever. So, unless French Maid Owner-Lady is some kind of cat whisper and can interpret "meow," methinks that putting a bar of soap (which is probably like poison to cats) is a bit of an overreaction to the foul language at the golf course. Besides, if it's Owner-Man's fault, why isn't she trying to force the bar of soap past his formidable broom-stache?

...and I swear Heathcliff was making a snowman the other day. Golf? In January? Must resist urge to kill...