Thursday, June 19, 2008
The Big News of the Neighborhood: Marcy from Peanuts moved in next door to the Nutmegs in their ever revolving cast of people who appear at the fence.
The Big News of the Nutmeg Family: "Heathcliff's pills are hidden in his food, but don't tell him! If I say it from this far away, he won't really get it! Also, don't tell Mr. Nutmeg that he's pretty much the most pussywhipped man on the block. After the hot dog eating contest, he has to rub my back, fetch me my froggie, tend to dinner, and then he gets to give me oral." - Mrs. Nutmeg
"My wife is fat and disgusting enough that years of her standing at that fucking window have caused the floorboards to buckle and break a bit, resulting in my being as tall as her, even though she's standing on what was once a raised surface." - Mr. Nutmeg
The Big News to M. Night Shyamalan: "Hot dogs don't really have the cool shape you espoused them to in The Happening. (Penis.) Rather, they look like overgrown Hostess cupcakes with the creme filling taken out." - Peter Gallagher.