Heathcliff, tired of having sex with cats, has decided to branch out into other nooks and crannies of the animal kingdom, starting with mice. Heathcliff's owners, not up with the lingo, call this a "play date" instead of what we now commonly refer to as the "pre-date." This slightly embarrasses Heathcliff, and it drastically increases the chances of his needing to use a roofie to seal the deal. For those of you wondering, the only requirements for being a possible target or date of this lovable, orange-haired ruffian is that you have arms, legs, a brain, and something to fuck. At least three out of the four.

No fat chicks.

Heathcliff: 1
Mice: 1