Heathcliff's French maid of an owner has been in a coma since forever, because Heathcliff has been nothing but finicky. Honestly, I think the only reason why this strip was published was because Peter Gallagher wanted to bring awareness to the plight of veterinarians who don't have feet. Why else would he miss out on a GOLDEN opportunity to have Heathcliff wear a "TURKEY" helmet, rape some Indians, and get fresh with a cat from the Mayflower? There's more important things to worry about, people! Every single day, a vet with no feet is forced to stumble his stumpy ass to the table, hoping that the next thermometer he shoves up a cat's ass will be the one that pays for a new pair of feet. Every day. If you're going to be thankful for anything, be thankful that you can walk on two feet, instead of stumps.

Please, think of the footless veterinarians.